This is my What Do I Choose? worksheet from Session 8 of The Advanced ME/CFS Recovery Programme with Ashok Gupta:
| LEFT PATH Negative Thoughts and Beliefs |
RIGHT PATH Positive Thoughts and Beliefs |
| I’m not good enough | I am good enough |
| I must be successful | I can be happy whether I succeed or fail |
| I want constant validation | I don’t need other people’s approval or validation |
| My family don’t understand me | I don’t need other people’s understanding to be happy |
| I need attention in order to feel good | I can feel good all by myself |
| I must not fail in front of other people | Other people’s opinions do not matter to me |
| I fear what other people think of me | Other people’s opinions do not matter to me |
| I’m afraid of being judged negatively | I don’t need judgemental people in my life |
| I hate negative criticism | I don’t have to take other people’s negativity on board |
| I’m afraid of rejection | Rejection is about them, not about me |
| I need people to like me | I have enough people in my life who like me already |
| I want attractive women to like me | I don’t need every attractive woman to like me |
| I’m afraid of the women I’m attracted to | The women I’m attracted to are just like me |
| She won’t like me | I don’t care if she likes me or not |
| She despises me | I don’t need judgemental people in my life |
| I’m a bad person | I’m a good person |
| People will reject me if I’m honest/real with them | I don’t care if people reject me or not |
| I’m a fraud | I am true to myself |
| I want to do stuff now; I don’t want to wait | I can wait if necessary |
| When will I “grow up”? | I am a capable adult |
| I’m not strong enough | I have all the inner strength I need |
| I wish I was more resilient | I have a good balance between vulnerability and resilience |
| I only enjoy life when I’m being successful | I can enjoy life whether I’m being successful or not |
| I hate failing | Every experience is an opportunity to learn |
| Losing money is a sign of failure | You need to spend money to make money |
| I want to be more successful with women | I’m already very successful with women |
| I’m a failure | I am a success |
| I’ll never succeed as a writer | I’m already successful as a writer |
| I won’t find fulfilling work again | I already know what work fulfils me |
3 Comments
Karen · November 8, 2017 at 9:28 PM
Wow this is priceless! Thank you for your posts. This is really helpful I’m batteling so hard with negative thoughts and emotions. Those negative beliefs have been running all my life, my parents were both abusive and severely mentally ill so being successful was the only way I thought people would love me. With that mindset I never got a break. I hope you are feeling better, I’m in the beginning of it but you give me hope. /Karen
Graham · November 12, 2017 at 4:13 PM
Hi Karen,
I’m so glad you found the posts helpful. I also had parents whose behaviour I found very stressful and pursued over-achievement when what I was really searching for was love. Do you have someone you can talk to about the impact of your abusive and severely mentally ill parents on your mindset and unconscious belief system?
Cheers, Graham
Danny · February 25, 2012 at 10:44 AM
I love this! So very true and inspiring